Sunday, August 18, 2002

Blame It On The Rain

How To Drink All Night And Not End Up Puking All Over The Craps Table:
1. Drink a shot of JD and/or a beer, or your alcoholic beverage (pronounced bev ar AJ 'cuz it sounds snooty) of choice.
2. Immediately afterward, drink water, or even better, those dandy flavored-water chock full of vitamins nature never intended water to have.
3. Repeat step one.
4. Repeat step two.
5. Wash. Rinse. Repeat.
And voila! You're buzzed with no worries of hurling the contents of that $15 buffet over the hot leggy blonde in the skimpy black number over by the blackjack table! (Well, you would have no worries of hurling the contents of that $15 buffet over the hot leggy blonde in the skimpy black number over by the blackjack table if you were to actually talk to her, you chickenbutt.)

How To Ensure That You'll Be Heading To The Las Vegas Hard Rock Cafe Urinals Every 10 Minutes:
1. Drink a shot of JD and/or a beer, or your alcoholic beverage (pronounced bev ar AJ 'cuz it sounds snooty) of choice.
2. Immediately afterward, drink water, or even better, those dandy flavored-water chock full of vitamins nature never intended water to have.
3. Repeat step one.
4. Repeat step two.
5. Wash. Rinse. Repeat.
And voila! You'll be in the john so much you start naming the urinals!

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