You've Just Been Hanging Out In The Men's Room

OK, so people say Aaron Sorkin is too talky, too pendantic. And yet you can't deny that the man knew how to write dialogue. Look at West Wing right now--it sucks ass through a straw.

One of my favorite shows (which is general a kiss of death for network televigion) is Sports Night, Aaron Sorkin's short-lived dramedy on ABC prior to West Wing. Like the best song lyrics, there's dialogue which hits the nail on the head for almost every life situation. Even more impressive, the show only lasted 2 seasons. Yeah, so after this whole sitch went down, I went through my Sports Night DVD compilation to find a snippet of dialogue that, in addition to Dido, The Afghan Whigs and Bob Dylan, kept going through my head. Let's hope the reason why is that there's a small portion of me that knows a version of this dialogue is going to be happening in the long run.

To setup, the two main sportscasters are Dan Rydell and Casey McCall. Casey, recently divorced, was in love with Dana, but Dana had this stupid plan to have Casey date other women for six months. Now Casey has moved on:

Dan: (putting the darts down) It was an idiotic dating plan, Dana. What did you think was going to happen?

Dana: Hey, Dan--

Dan: Forget that he's meeting all kinds of women, that was gonna happen. But the one that he wanted was you, anyway.

Dana: Wanted?

Dan: (sighs) All this is doing is making him feel a lot less like the man he is, which is why he left Lisa in the first place. (sits down across from her) I know what he wants, and I gotta say, he's done a pretty good job of going after it, which isn't, like, the most natural thing in the world for Casey to do. And I know what you want. And all I've seen you do is hide behind this psychotic behavior all dressed up as cute. He wanted you, and he told you every possible way he could. You've just been hanging out in the men's room. (gets up and leaves her looking miserable)


(Dana enters the bar hesitantly, looking around, then going up to the bartender)

Dana: Jack.

Jack: Hey, Dana.

Dana: Was Casey in here tonight?

Jack: You just missed him.

Dana: He left?

Jack: Yeah. You need anything?

Dana: Was he in here alone?

Jack: (a bit awkwardly) He met someone.

Dana: A girl?

Jack: Yeah, with a strange name.

Dana: Pixley.

Jack: Yeah.

Dana: They leave together?

Jack: Yeah.

Dana: (nodding painfully) Okay.

Jack: You need anything?

Dana: Uh... no. (gives a false smile that quickly fades into pain again)

(Fade out)